Texas Bar Examination...The Final Chapter

I sat down to write this post while the news was still fresh, but had technical problems that forced me to abandon the blog for a bit (aka: my computer hates how I treat it and went on strike). As such, you're going to have to get my stale recollection of Thursday instead.

To start at the beginning: Texas Bar Exam results were slated to be released on 5/3/2013, but everyone told me they like to release a day early around lunch time.

Let's just say that on Thursday, I woke up in a tizzy and didn't get much more tolerable as the minutes (slowly) ticked by. I opened the bar exam page around 9:00 and started refreshing every twenty minutes or so while trying to keep myself busy in the meantime. I pace when I'm nervous, and sound more wheezy than normal (which, for an asthmatic, that's saying something)....I tend to hover around "hyperventilating" when I'm anticipating something.

Pretty much....

Needless to say, my mother wasn't amused. I somehow managed to not freak out until about eleven thirty, at which time I started clicking a lot more frequently. And after 12:00 rolled around and I didn't have scores, it commenced at ten second intervals. By 12:30, I was frantic. But results were still not forthcoming.

By that time, my mom had had enough. She loaded me up in the car and we headed to the nearest Mexican restaurant, where I promptly knocked back two margaritas (on the rocks, with light rocks...a GENIUS idea that makes you look like a true alcoholic) and FORGOT all about the bar examination.

Get your VITAMEATABAREXAM here!!!!!

It wasn't until my ride home, where I was literally laid across the back seat of the car (at 2:30 in the afternoon, which technically sounds early, but actually means that I had been waiting for three hours by this point) that I got a text from a friend with the link to the results and the words "Uh, I don't know..." that it all came flooding back to me. With as much trepidation as I could manage in my inebriated condition, I scrolled down through the results and LANDED ON MY NAME. My mom thought I was having a seizure in the backseat. I'm not exaggerating when I say I started kicking the roof and rolling around like a Pentecostal preacher at a revival. (I'll let you savor that picture for a moment.) After that, I took one of the most fulfilling naps I've ever had in my life. No lie. Because that's how I roll.

I'm now certified in two states, but unemployed. But still....LICENSED. I'd like to thank everyone for their support and congratulations, for putting up with me, and especially my boyfriend for not only having the faith to fund me on this endeavor, but for also giving up tons of fun time with me (snort) so that I could study and prepare. I have to say, I'm pretty damn proud of myself too, because I studied for this on my own, and honestly didn't think I'd have either the stamina or the dedication to actually pass the damn thing. Guess I can even prove myself wrong sometimes.

Congrats to everyone who passed, good luck to anyone who is taking it again (because, let's not lie, the TBE FRIGGIN SUCKED AND ANYONE CAN FORESEEABLY FAIL IT), and most of all:

(What? Like you're really surprised I used this gif? As if....)

Bar Exam Neurosis

Let's be clear: I don't use my blawg to create a persona. I am true to myself, and am perfectly fine being super ridiculous and nerdy and cheesy. 

So I'm gonna drop some truth on you right now: when it comes to test-taking, I am a NEUROTIC BITCH. Not like, oh, kinda crazy and don't bathe when it comes time to take the test. Like, have to regurgitate said test back in my hotel room so I can purge it from my mind forever. 

Yeah, you heard that right. I rewrite all the questions I can remember from the exam. Because I'm fucking crazy. (Although I would rather be crazy than think it's acceptable NOT TO BATHE WHEN I'M GOING TO BE IN PUBLIC.)

Proof is in the (cray) pudding. And my neurosis is especially evident in the fact that no,
you can't read my writing because I resized the photo to prevent such things from happening. 

Today, I managed to remember 94 questions from each session. No, I will not give them to you. No, I do not plan on disseminating them to anyone. I will probably burn them after this fucking bar exam, because really, they serve no purpose to me. They're just the byproduct of mental cleansing. 

And yet, I feel no less crazy now than when I started. 

(Don't judge me.)

(My mother does that enough for the both of us)

Texas Bar Examination update

Update on Texas Bar Examination:

1. Please don't forget to send in your letters of good standing. ::facepalm::

2. Also, don't forget to send in your MPRE results. (Goodbye, $25...)

3. I somehow forgot to sign a notarized document in the Texas Bar Exam packet. Like, it was notarized, but I just didn't sign it. (What the hell is wrong with me?!!?!?)

4. Can I restate how amazing my Twitter community is? Particularly Adamdm4, who sent me his Barbri books to study with. :)

5. Though I've had my mess-ups along the way, Texas has been extremely nice throughout the entire application process, so there IS that....

6. I've been retyping the lecture handouts with blanks to fill in with my own handwriting, which is a long and arduous task that I'm afraid I am going to give up soon....

7. But I've made it through Agency/Partnership. And Bankruptcy. And Texas Civil Procedure. :) This is good, no? 

8. On the other hand, that means I've completed ~100 pages. Out of the phonebook that is Barbri.

::gulp::

9. Today I'm focusing on Federal Income Taxation. Then I might reward myself with some Criminal Law review. I'm such a rebel.

10. I've officially got all of my Texas documents turned in. Now....we wait. (And rejoice.)

I HATE HATE HATE PACKING

I'm finally moving from my apartment (back into my parents' house until I find a job....fail) and am feverishly packing. I packed for a while during October and the last time I was in town, but left stuff because I didn't know when I would *officially* be moving out. I gave my notice a week or so ago. Then I started packing kinda for real.

Yesterday, my wonderful boyfran and I loaded up my house furniture that I wanted to keep, leaving my bedroom furniture alone (because that shit is new and if we fucked it up, I was going to cut someone). The things I didn't want, we put on the curb. The definition of hysterical? Watching a couple of frat guys claim your old pink particleboard desk. After our first trip, one of my dear friends came over to assist with the bedroom furniture. By seven o'clock p.m. we had moved all my furniture to my storage unit.

This is after actually cleaning up the living room. 

The rest of the house, however, is a joke. There are dustballs everywhere and I woke up this morning barely able to breathe. My dogs also made this trip with me after being MIA for several months (bf was starting to get pissed that he hadn't seen them). Crackers is sullen, having been pulled from outside where she can eat whenever the hell she feels like it and run around doing things that are generally looked down upon in my household. The second dog, Rosy, (who used to be an outside dog) came inside and told me she's never going back outside EVER. Except to pee.

So now I'm alone again, packing up the rest of my shit and wondering if I would actually miss anything if I just were to throw it all away.

I don't think I would.

I assure you this is a lot more shameful in person. 

No...really.

Random thoughts on a Wednesday

1) I need this dress. Like, WHY THE HECK IS THIS DRESS NOT IN MY CLOSET? If anyone wants to buy it for me and pay for the (almost assuredly) ridiculous dry cleaning bill to try to maintain ALL THE PLEATS, I shall divulge my size to you.

(No...but really....)

2) Interviewed for a job a couple of days ago. It wasn't so bad, except I had to go in at 6:45 IN THE EVENING and due to the length of the interview, my mother thought I had been abducted by a band of thieves that wanted to sell me into sexual slavery. As a result of this interview, I've been revamping my appellate brief I wrote back in 2L year (which means I've been working strictly on the standard of review, which is really difficult for questions of mixed fact and law...) to send in as a writing sample.

(I'm pretty sure the answer for my particular problem is de novo with deference, in case you were wondering.)

3) The previously-mentioned job interview made me realize how little I know about tax implications. So I spoke to my awesome friend (whose blog is located here) who is receiving her LLM in tax, and also went to speak to my friendly neighborhood CPA. If anyone here is wondering if they should speak to people who know things about taxes.....the answer is yes. You should. Because those people rock. (Also, if you're thinking of going solo, wouldn't it be nice for you to know things about taxes/deductions/best method of incorporation before you jump into something feet first?)

4) I'm working on filling out the last bit of information for my patent bar. This was difficult mostly due to the fact that I have to locate EVERY ticket I've ever been given that was more than $100. Which is every ticket I've ever been given. (I'm lucky I'm young. They apparently don't have a date to stop at, although I'm sure 90 year olds didn't pay more than $100 for tickets until more recently....)

5) I'm also working on completing the last bit of my paperwork for the Texas Bar. Because I'm a masochist. Only thing left (if I'm not mistaken) is getting my fingerprints. Which leads me to think that I am going to make a checklist for future Texas bar examinees. For how much you have to pay the great state of Texas for the "privilege" of taking their test, you'd think they could maintain a more user-friendly, organized website. Of course, I'm not surprised.